Parenting can be enormously rewarding, but there are certainly days when it feels extra challenging. Whether you’re a parent or foster carer, you’re bound to face hard days when the kids are extra fussy, you feel overwhelmed and exhausted, and it seems like nothing is going right. During these difficult days, it’s important to be gentle with yourself and have some go-to coping strategies. Here are some tips to help you get through the tough times:
Take a Break
It’s okay to walk away for a few minutes and recharge. Put your child somewhere safe like their cot or playpen, and step outside in the garden for some fresh air. Splash cold water on your face, do some deep breathing, or call a friend or loved one for moral support. Taking even a brief break can help you reset so you’re better equipped to handle the challenges when you return. Don’t feel guilty about giving yourself this time – it will ultimately help you be more present and patient with your child.
Do Some Self-Care
When parenting stress starts to build up, it’s vital that you practice self-care to avoid burnout. Eat a healthy meal, take a warm shower or bath, put on cosy pyjamas, light a scented candle, or listen to calming music. Reading an uplifting book, watching a funny show, or looking at old photos can also boost your mood. Getting adequate sleep is crucial too. Nurturing yourself helps you nurture your child.
Keep Perspective
When you’re exhausted and your child is having a tantrum, it’s easy to get sucked into a vortex of negativity. Try to maintain perspective by reminding yourself that this hard period is temporary, and focussing on the big picture of all the joy your child brings. Look back on how much they’ve grown and hit key milestones, especially if they are a child you are fostering with ispfostering.org.uk. Hold onto the fact that you’re doing your best, and that tomorrow is a new day.
Engage in Distraction
Sometimes, redirecting your child’s attention can help diffuse stressful situations. Engage them in a fun activity like reading a book, singing songs, playing with blocks, or going to the park. At the very least, it can provide a reset. Having a variety of engaging toys and activities on hand can make distraction easier when tensions are high.
Anticipate Challenging Times
Reflect on when your child’s most trying behaviour tends to occur, whether it’s right before naptime or when they’re hungry. You can’t prevent every difficult moment but anticipating them helps you proactively address their needs. Staying one step ahead of meltdowns can make your hard days a little smoother.
Let Go of Unrealistic Expectations
When parenting gets tough, it’s common to have unrealistic expectations for how your child “should” be behaving or how much you can handle before losing your cool. Let go of perfectionist tendencies and accept that you both are human. While striving to be the best parent you can be, give yourself permission make mistakes without judgment.
Parenting during the hard days requires endurance, an arsenal of coping skills, and being gentle on yourself. With the right self-care and support system, you can get through the tough times. These strategies help make the challenging days a little easier to bear, until calmer, brighter days return.
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